[[• Contemplations Within Struggle •]] [[• v.23 Midnight Enchantment •]]

The Magician

Meira Kurosaki. Xedosarthea. Rey Za Burrel Barvon. Female, born on May 27, 1988. Loves anime / manga, coffee, going online, lazing around, yaoi, shounen-ai, anime music, J-pop/J-rock, angsting, drawing, procrastinating, listening to music. Narrow-minded. Weird. College student. Does not have a bright future. XD

Related links

Albion Palace

Methuselah Empire

Recent Music

Fleurs du Mal

The Ghetto

The Gate

Ichiraku Ramen Forum
Minitokyo | Anime Paper
VN Manga | Evil Empire
Gendou.com | Gaia Online
Jpop Jrock Rotation
Not A Shrimp | OFF RAMP
Kingdom of Knuffel

Drops of Blood

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My Name

ANGELI - Adventurous. Neat. Glorious. Elegant. Luscious(?!). Inspirational.

MEIRA - Misunderstood. Exquisite. Insane. Radiant. Artistic.
And your name means...?

Other Stuff

Link me banners:
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This site is certified 43% evil and 57% good by the Gematriculator.

The layout

The current layout features Syaoran and Sakura from the anime/manga Tsubasa Reservoir Chronicle. The pic was downloaded from the Aethereality Gallery. This layout was designed/edited by me with the use of Notepad and Adobe Photoshop. Except for the image/s, fonts, textures/patterns and brushes used, everything else is mine, so no take and no ripping off. Tsubasa Reservoir Chronicle is © CLAMP. This layout was uploaded on August 19, 2007.

The mood icons

Weee.. XD The GS/GSD Club mood icons are credited to The Gundam Seed Community @ LJ for posting(?) and/or advertising these mood icons. It features the SEED Club, which is like a collection of chibi Gundam SEED/Destiny pics. They're so cute, and I can't resist using them. The icons were supposed to be for LJ blogs only, but anyway... So, yeah.. I'm crediting.. so I guess it's okay.. hehehe *salutes* ^^;

Waii~ XD And~ the Trinity Blood mood icons... they're created by me, so no take and no ripping off. Thank you. XD *salutes*

My Tarot Card

Positive: The Chariot card represents the need to take control of ones actions to rise above the conflicts in ones life. The Chariot alerts us of the need to draw energy not only from our material resources but from within as well. The Chariot reminds us that we must have balanced energy in order to reap the rewards of all that life has given us. The Chariot represents a dualistic nature and that every action has an equal and opposite reaction. Focus and awareness is necessary in order to make the most out of the situation. Most importantly, the Chariot represents the need to hold on tightly to the reigns because should we let go we will face the likelihood of going way off course. Ultimately, if we don't hold tight and steer our way through, our life can get way out of control.

Negative: When reversed this card represents a lack of drive and focus or letting others manipulate us to their own ends. It can also mean arrogance or foolhardy behavior. A lack of control and imbalanced thought.

Tuesday, December 13, 2005
A somewhat bad day II

I know this is absolutely NOT the right time for updating. I still got 2 homeworks to do but they're type-work, so... ohh nevermind..

If I was annoyed awhile ago, well now I'm feeling depressed. I can't help but think if I'm really doing something right or not... because it seems like every time I do something, my parents tell me that I'm not doing it right because I'm getting too "dependent".

What can I do? I really can't think of a good solution for our Accounting assignment. I thought hard and I almost scanned every page of the book but I really can't understand... so I called one of my friends and asked for help and a little explanation. Soon enough I understood the lesson, but as soon as I put down the phone my mom started talking about me being too dependent. She said that if I were to retain the same attitude in my studies, I won't pass. She told me that I should try to make my mind "work".

I know, she has a point. I understand what she meant, but... it's a new lesson! Besides, it's an assignment. Now I'm confused. Is it bad to consult others? I know I did a wrong computation with my answer but at least, through my "consultation" with my classmate, I learned that what I did was wrong. And I learned from it...

Oh I dunno... I'm more confused now. But, can't we just discuss? Besides, even if I copy, I try to see to it that I understood what I copied... *cries*

It's really hard if you can't explain your side sometimes. Especially if you can't have a chance to say your side... Really. That's why I'm usually depressed. I'm pretty sure that I might have a heart disease when I grow up. It's all because of the burdens I carry... Oh well.

You know what, I really feel like crying now. But I can't, because my mom would see me, and she would ask, and another night-long discussion would await me. I don't want to hurt my mom, so I'll just shoulder the pain myself. After all, I'm alone, in a way. Almost no one symphatizes with me. Even some of my friends...

Sometimes life is just so unfair. I always do my best to comfort my friends when they're in tears, but when I'm in tears or in despair, I don't seem to feel any warmth. No support, no genuine mercy. I always give my all, but I always receive nothing. Why is it that I'm only visible when I'm needed? But when the time comes that I need them, they become invisible. Why is that? Of all the people, why me?

Now I can't help but think about what I'm going to become after all these "challenges"... *sigh*

Okay, enough of this nonsense. No one cares anyway. Right? *sigh*
I'm gonna go now. It's almost 11 pm and I'm not yet done with my homework... I'm pretty sure that I'd fail our quiz in Finance tomorrow. I didn't review at all.

3 broken chains [+] 10:47 PM