Meira Kurosaki. Xedosarthea. Rey Za Burrel Barvon. Female, born on May 27, 1988. Loves anime / manga, coffee, going online, lazing around, yaoi, shounen-ai, anime music, J-pop/J-rock, angsting, drawing, procrastinating, listening to music. Narrow-minded. Weird. College student. Does not have a bright future. XD
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ANGELI - Adventurous. Neat. Glorious. Elegant. Luscious(?!). Inspirational.

MEIRA - Misunderstood. Exquisite. Insane. Radiant. Artistic.

And your name means...?
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The current layout features Syaoran and Sakura from the anime/manga Tsubasa Reservoir Chronicle. The pic was downloaded from the Aethereality Gallery. This layout was designed/edited by me with the use of Notepad and Adobe Photoshop. Except for the image/s, fonts, textures/patterns and brushes used, everything else is mine, so no take and no ripping off. Tsubasa Reservoir Chronicle is © CLAMP. This layout was uploaded on August 19, 2007.

Weee.. XD The GS/GSD Club mood icons are credited to The Gundam Seed Community @ LJ for posting(?) and/or advertising these mood icons. It features the SEED Club, which is like a collection of chibi Gundam SEED/Destiny pics. They're so cute, and I can't resist using them. The icons were supposed to be for LJ blogs only, but anyway... So, yeah.. I'm crediting.. so I guess it's okay.. hehehe *salutes* ^^;

Waii~ XD And~ the Trinity Blood mood icons... they're created by me, so no take and no ripping off. Thank you. XD *salutes*

Do you want to know what your tarot card is? Click here! Positive: The Chariot card represents the need to take control of ones actions to rise above the conflicts in ones life. The Chariot alerts us of the need to draw energy not only from our material resources but from within as well. The Chariot reminds us that we must have balanced energy in order to reap the rewards of all that life has given us. The Chariot represents a dualistic nature and that every action has an equal and opposite reaction. Focus and awareness is necessary in order to make the most out of the situation. Most importantly, the Chariot represents the need to hold on tightly to the reigns because should we let go we will face the likelihood of going way off course. Ultimately, if we don't hold tight and steer our way through, our life can get way out of control.

Negative: When reversed this card represents a lack of drive and focus or letting others manipulate us to their own ends. It can also mean arrogance or foolhardy behavior. A lack of control and imbalanced thought.



Monday, July 31, 2006
Gwaaaah... ~_~

[mood | giddy]
[music | Malice Mizer - Baroque]

It's been a while since I last updated o.o; gawd, I can't believe it. I've been busy? O__O *gasps*

...

Anyway, I'm not sure if this is going to be a long post, but I intend for it to be short. So yeah, we've been busy with projects and assignments for the past few days, although I did a little "break" from Friday-Saturday because I was busy preparing for the NCC (National Cosplay Competition) which was held yesterday (July 30).

It was fun, and I'm quite happy too since I got into the top 50 O_o And quite amused with the Abel cosplayer because he improved his costume... and well, I wanted his Krusnik scythe.. lol. XDXD So yep, I got into the top 50, and I'm contented with that ^^; Although I'm more happy because I got to meet more cosplayers and... friends, perhaps.

I was kinda bothered with my make-up though, I think Nicole put too much foundation on my face. (She was too excited, I guess XD no offense, Nicole XP) I didn't look pale, I looked...white O_o And judging from the pictures that were taken on my digicam (especially the yaoi pic with Abel-sama T__T) , I really looked white. There's even this pic wherein I looked like I .. I dunno. I can't describe it =_=" So imagine that, I went through the catwalk thingy (for the top 100) looking like some weird, overly-powdered magician. O_o I got to fix it a bit after that, though, so I guess I looked a bit more okay in the catwalk thingy (for the top 50).

We were on camera during the event, and I'm not really sure if I looked okay there or not... *DIES*

*sings* Ako'y isang espasol~~~~

...I was kinda surprised with the top 50 catwalk though, because there was even a Q&A portion o_O And we were like "wtf, is this a pageant?" XD Each cosplayer was given different a different question and... mine's kinda okay, but my brain decided to stop functioning at the wrong moment. =_=

Me: *enters stage, bows, holds makeshift cigarette and tries to make a magic something something pose, then walks towards the mic*
Judge: .... okay, what made you choose your character for cosplay? :D
Me: Er, uh, well~ This character amused me. He's calm, and he has a .. a.. good ... good *pauses* demeanor... And he looks cool even if he's just calm..?
Judge: o_O .. Uh, okay, thank you ^^;
Me: ^^; *makes her last lame pose before going down the stage*

I'm so lame =_= ... but I guess my brain already stopped functioning when the emcee introduced me as "a recruit from the Vatican". O_o Erm, hi, I'm Isaak, I'm from the ORDEN, not the VATICAN. O_o lol do I look "holy" in my Orden uniform? *blinks*

Oh well.

The event was fun, although I wasn't able to do much "shopping", although I'm quite happy because at least I got to buy a black Mokona doll (which is the same size as my white Mokona doll), a random manga (which is Rurouni Kenshin O_o), a random poster (which is Cloud carrying Kadaj, from FF7:AC) and also this TB necklace which is some sort of red and gold cross. I didn't really want to buy the cross since it wasn't Abel's cross (I want that cross so badly T~T), but I bought it since the words "Trinity Blood" (which were written on the cardboard-paper thingy) kept pulling me in. XD Besides, it was the only TB item left in the stall~ so... X3

Haha, yep, I'm an addict. ~_~"

I also got to see some people who I met during the Toycon cosplay~ and one of them, Carla, cosplayed an Inquisitor :3 we weren't able to take any pics though, since we've been too busy with the NCC T__T And to think that I was already planning some sort of skit-thingy, lol. XD

So anyway, Ozinefest/NCC would be another event that I'd forever cherish in my heart. *mushmush* XD
Although I'm pretty sure that if I were to come to another event, I'll come as a spectator and not as a cosplayer... ~_~" My Isaak costume needs a break. XD And I'm not really enthusiastic about wearing the same costume for .. many times ^^;; Baka kasi pagsawaan, lol.

Oh well.

I guess we need to go back to our usual routines now, lol. Back to the old cram-for-homework and no-sleeping routine~~

Methuselah mode~ on. *starts cramming*

0 broken chains [+] 9:09 PM  


Tuesday, July 25, 2006
Finished, yet unfinished.

[mood | worried]
[music | FF7:Advent Children - One Winged Angel (Cloud vs Sephiroth)]

Meh, can't log in to YM. It keeps error-ing when I get to connect. =__= Now I regret updating my YM to YM Beta. Dammit.

Anyway, I'm almost done with my English, I have around 10+ cards left do draw/print. XD Yay. I'm happy that I'm almost finished my English project, but I'm still worried for our Accounting class tomorrow.

I know tomorrow's a Wednesday, and we only have Accounting class during Tuesdays and Thursdays. But our professor said we'll be having a make-up class tomorrow, and he also said that we'll be submitting our assignment (which is to answer ALL the problems under the Bank Reconciliation chapter), so yeah.

And I'm darn proud (yep, I'm sarcastic here) to say that I haven't done ANYTHING with my Accounting assignment yet. What can I do? I'm too busy attending to my other assignments, and also I'm busy with my English project. I'm determined to finish it since it would be a shame to submit an incomplete project~ despite the fact that we were given LOTS of time to do this.

So yeah, I won't be submitting anything tomorrow for Accounting. I'm taking the risk here, but what the heck. Maybe I'll try copying tomorrow, IF someone would even be WILLING to let me copy her notes.

Ah, darn it.

Now, I say, I don't really think that I'd make it into 3rd year Accountancy. I'll be ending up at another course, or maybe end up in hell (after ending up in the coffin or something).

Classes were suspended yesterday and today. I know I spent my time doing the project, but I guess it still wasn't enough. Oh well, I tried.

I tried and I fail- at life.

...At least, there's a little feeling of contentment within me, somehow. At least I got to finish a lot. ~_~" That's what I accomplished for today, I guess...

0 broken chains [+] 8:35 PM  



Of downloading sprees and class suspensions.

[mood | excited]
[music | Rain - Sad Tango]

You know~ It's funny, I tend to update more during school days, and I update rarely when we have no classes. Haha. Oh well. ~_~

So we don't have classes again today (we didn't have classes yesterday as well), and I'm saved from the recitation in Accounting (FOR THE NTH TIME! WOOT). XD Indeed, Mother Nature is merciful to us students, every once in a while. LOL.

Since I'm not yet done with my project, I can still have the "excuse" for going online. I'm downloading some pics (for m project) from the net, although I'm downloading more mp3s rather than pics since I have pics on my comp anyway. XD

*nods* I am addicted to Limewire, woot. XD And I'm addicted to Rain's songs, particularly "Sad Tango". I just found out that the Rain who's singing this song is the same Rain who starred at the Korean drama, Full House. O_O Well, that's what our maid said, anyway. But still~ wooooooot. He has a nice voice. *_* I think it's the first time I fangirled over a singer-artist or something. Or maybe not? *thinks of Hyde*

Anyway, as for the project, I have around 90+ words left to make. My mom said it's still many, but it's already "few" for me since I'm almost done. I'm excited, nyah. I want to finish it today. XD

Or then again...I'll finish it after I take a bath, lol.

Oh well~ that's all for now. Jaa XD

0 broken chains [+] 7:48 AM  


Saturday, July 22, 2006
So much for a one-on-one study...

[mood | somewhat accomplished]
[music | Malice Mizer - Beast of Blood]

... *repeats the title*

Oh well. XD

I asked my friend Mitchie to come over my house.. and we were supposed to work on our Accounting homework (which is so dark looooong and difficult) but we ended up not doing it =.= Instead, we ended up working on each other's English projects.

*nods* Yep yep. XD But she didn't draw though, we just tried helping each other out with the words and stuff.

And... it's Sunday AGAIN tomorrow, nyah~ and then we'll be back at school on Monday =.= They said that our country's president would be making her SONA (State-of-the-Nation Address), but there would still be classes.. I dunno. =_= I guess I'm hoping too much.

Time is so fast. It's almost time for the submission of our English project!!! O__O It's on the 27th and I'm still not finished, despite the fact that I DIDN'T draw all of my cards anymore. I printed some out XD *coughmangascansincomputercough*

I still have a long way to go. Around 150++ more. (Yes, I only finished around 10 cards for today. I am THAT lazy)

OMC, my mom's so gonna kill me. My printer's running low on black ink again, thanks to my English project. Meh. XD

I feel quite accomplished today (even if I wasn't able to accomplish much with my English project o.O) I got to download Limewire, and I got to download some mp3s that I've been hunting since... our flight back from Singapore (I heard some music on their "station" during the flight, so there). So....... yay~!! XD

I'm so in love with Beast of Blood (or is it Beasts of Blood? o.O) right now. <33 Yay.

Andandand one more week before Ozinefest/National Cosplay Competition <33 Woot. I still don't have the patches. But I'm quite happy because at least, my costume now has a pocket. At least I can put my wallet and cellphone in it.. and yeah. XD

I still need those patches. =_= And I reallyreallyREALLY need to re-make my gloves and armband soon. >.< Gah, so many things to do, so little time.

Oh well. Maybe I'll go to sleep now.

0 broken chains [+] 10:11 PM  


Friday, July 21, 2006
Of English projects and getting online... and some other crap.

[mood | enraged]
[music | Wolf's Rain - Stray]

I'm supposed to be offline now because I needed to work on my English project, but then again, I thought of updating first before I diss myself off the net.

My mom barged into my room awhile ago and went.. naggy (as usual) about me using the Internet. The phone was "on" since this afternoon, so I thought of going online this evening. So yeah, I was pretty sure that she "lifted" the handset downstairs and found out that I'm online... and well, the rest was history, lol.

I'm annoyed because I rarely get to go online these days (thanks to some effing professors who think that their subject is the only subject that we are taking up), and now that I'm online, they get mad.

*groans* What's so wrong about going online? They should be happy that AT LEAST, I'm not hogging the internet THAT much anymore (much to my dismay T_T), and at least, I'm doing homework! Okay, nevermind that. *curses*

I'm still working on my English project (yes, the 250 words-drawings thingy) and I have around 160+ words left to do. Yes, there's a big decrease, because I did some "instant" cards awhile ago to lessen the load. I got some pics from various pictures in my folders here, and I made them into cards. Heh, effortless, but I'm really starting to doubt that I'd finish all 250 words if I DREW them all. So yep, I'm printing. Some. XD I'll still draw, don't worry.

So yeah, my mom also said something about my 250 words project. She said that she's quite worried because my project seems thick (hell yeah, it IS thick) and it might give our professor a hard time to carry it around. =___=

It's so typical of my mom to worry about something like that but I'm prepared for that. I already have a box here, it just needs some decoration.

I dunno... I was annoyed by the way she said it. She's acting as if she's my professor already, dammit.

So what if my project is thick? It's my idea (despite the fact that some terran "plagiarized" the idea too), and I can do anything I want with it. After all, our professor said that we can do ANYTHING with our project, as long as we get to present all the words... so why should she bother? As if naman maaapektuhan sila kapag makapal ang project ko... anong masama dun?

*groans again* Dammit. It's my project, it's my effort, so any consequences thereafter would be my responsibility. So if the professor says it's ugly, too anime-ish, too many/too thick, or something else, so be it. At least I'd be proud to say that I thought of the idea, and I didn't depend on my parents for the design or any other crap (except for the electricity and printer ink, duh).

I dunno but I feel that I don't have much privacy here (at home) anymore. It seems that they WANT me to TELL them everything, and I mean EVERYTHING.

Hell, no.

I'm gonna keep "hiding" some things from them, as usual. That's what privacy is for, after all.

Besides, it seems that I get at least a five-minute sermon for EVERY f*cking thing that I mention/share/say/voice out.

So I guess it's better to be silent, haha. Silence is bliss. Feeeh.

I wanna kill myself now (yes, really. I'm not calling for attention here, but I'm really driven to. my life is getting me crazy. But, I need to buy/find some good poison first XD) but I still have some cosplay plans to attend to, and I'm still in the Accountancy Program. Maybe I'll wait till I find out I'm out of the program or something. Meh.

I hate my life. =_=

...

Oh and I read some messages on the Filcosplay forum and.. I read that the NCC Participants are required to be at the event before 12 noon. O__________O ...OMC. XD I can't help but feel more excited. XD

However, before the event, comes the projects and some other crap.

Yaaaay. *in a sarcastic tone*

0 broken chains [+] 8:33 PM  


Thursday, July 20, 2006
Meh...

[mood | blah]
[music | the sound of many keyboards tapping.]

Updating from the comp lab now. I'm in a hurry because my parents are outside now >_>"

I miss going online, really. But I don't have much time, I still have 220+ words left to draw for our project in English. =__= Other than that, we have LOADS of homework to do.

I simply dunno how I will start on the work for next week. XD I really need to manage my time =_= So many things to do, gah. XD

I just thought of posting since I... really miss updating. ~_~"

Random note: Terrans are annoying.

Meh... I still feel enthusiastic about our English project, though. But it seems that I need at least TWO whole days (without sleep, perhaps) to complete everything. ~_~" And considering the overly-detailed drawings per word, I don't think I'll be coloring it anymore. O_o Although I already colored 13 (I painted them with... watercolor), but I think I'll scan them, make them into B&W, and then print them out again.

It's just now I realized that I don't need to color my drawings anymore, because (according to my classmates), they already look okay. Besides, I don't really think I'd be able to color them all, because I'm already "hard up" drawing them, considering that I don't have much time.

Oh well, I need to budget my time. XD I still need to do some homework in Finance later.. =_= I hope my "partner" will contact me too, though. =_=

0 broken chains [+] 3:41 PM  


Tuesday, July 18, 2006
I seriously need to post, so I'm posting.

[mood | rushed]
[music | Tsubasa Chronicle - Amrita]

Okay, I was supposed to update at school (in the computer lab) awhile ago, but Blogger didn't load. =_=" (I think I need to tell it to the people in charge there.. or something O_o) So yeah... it was useless. Oh well.

You might be wondering why I'm online O_o I'm supposed to be kinda grounded, but what the heck. Nevermind. I'm using my English project as an excuse so I can update just this once before I go insane again. But I'm working on my project too! *copying a random KKJ pic now for a random card*

Err.. okay, moving on. *ahem*

A lot has happened during the past few days, although I'm not in the mood to type them all down. First off, I got kinda grounded from going online, so... yeah. ~_~" I know it's crap but I guess I have to live with it for a while. I got into a major argument-turned-drama-and-then-into-an-argument-again with my parents last Sunday [night], and yeah. I won't go into details with this one because I don't want to remember it. Meh.

And on a random note, I'm seeing to it that I "shut up" when I'm with my parents. Well, it's not in the sense that I don't talk anymore, but I won't be talking unless I'm asked to, or something. Because...
1) If I talk about anything related to school, they'll blabber about studying hard... again.
2) If I talk about anime/cosplay, they start cursing/swearing anime and blabber about "dedicating 70% of your time to studies, not to any other BULLSHIT."

So it's better to shut up rather than being annoyed, ne? *grins*

So anyway, my life is boring as usual, and I got annoyed at the terrans (you know who they are) around me-- a lot. XD I dunno, I seem to be easily annoyed these days. Maybe the stress at home + stress in school is getting on to me.. lol.

I miss going online, nyah. XD;; Although I guess it's for my own good since I really have a lot of stuff to do, and I need to work hard so I can be homework-free by July 28. I seriously need to attend to my costume for NCC, I still haven't made anything "new". ~_~ I need to buy "new" gloves first, though. And also some red cloth for the "new" armband. XD And yes.. *gasps* the darned patches. *shrugs* WHERE AM I GOING TO FIND SOMEONE WHO MAKES THE RCO PATCHES?!?!!?!

Mou... I really need to have a haircut soon, maybe.. after the cosplay? XD; But really, I need a haircut soon, it's getting hard to manage my hair. And that includes the split-ends. *groans*

I'm kinda lenient tonight since.. we didn't have any classes last Friday (our professors didn't show up O_o). So it's like a "new" meeting tomorrow. Although I'm pretty sure that there MIGHT be a quiz in Finance... but I'm too lazy to review since I'm too enthusiastic about my English project. Besides, I even doubt that I'd even remember ALL those 20+++ formulas. =__= Meh.

...

I felt like typing something but... I dunno. I'm out of words... soo... bye for now. ^^;

0 broken chains [+] 9:18 PM  


Sunday, July 16, 2006
Talk about equivalent trade. =__=

[mood | frustrated]
[music | Ghost in the Shell - Lithium Flower]

I know I'm kinda annoyed at my parents these days, but for once, they have said something that I'm totally agreeing with.

Yep, they're right. A lot of people "gain" something from me, while I don't "receive" something in return. I always try to help people in need, but when I'm the one who needs help, I have to struggle on my own.

I just thought about this while talking (well not really talking, it's more like a very short conversation) with one of my friends (no, this isn't you Talia, Shinn, or any of my HS friends). ~_~ Meh, I'm not mad, just.. frustrated.

I'm only asking for a little thing, which is a VOTE for the National Cosplay Competition. It's just one vote, and even if you needed to register, it's not really tedious.

It's just.. one thing. One little thing, and she .. well.. nevermind.

Again, I say, I'm not mad. Just frustrated because I think I've done some stuff for her before, but oh well.

That's life, I guess.

Anyway~ I just realized that I really have to work hard before July 30. XD I have a lot to do, and I should be free of schoolwork by the 28th since I still need to make/paint/decorate a new pair of gloves, and also repaint/remake my armband. And also go shopping for make-up (black eyeshadow and white foundation, to be exact). XD

Meh. I need to take a break from going online. I need to accomplish... a lot. XD; Gawd I need more SELF-discipline. Not discipline from my parents, thank you. XD

I miss Starbucks Coffee. ~_~" Especially that Caramel Macchiato. I'd love to drink it now but it's not that cold/rainy anymore.. oh well. XD

0 broken chains [+] 5:03 PM  


Saturday, July 15, 2006
"I had no idea he was so desperate..." -Ion

[mood | angsty]
[music | that TB episode where Ion is angsting and stuff...]

I just realized that watching angsty/touching/tearjerking scenes (of any anime, but particularly TB?XD) is a good excuse for crying, even if your reason isn't really about what you're watching.. I guess all those annoyances are really getting on to me, I just realized that my tears are trying to resurface again. I just needed a good cry. My heart feels so heavy that I feel like it's going to break down or something.

My dad was in the room awhile ago, he was watching a random old movie (as usual) on my DVD player. Nothing special about that, since he wasn't so annoying (unlike a few days ago). My mom also went into my room and as usual, she started blabbing about studies and stuff.

I just can't help but feel restless because she keeps blabbing about me using the computer. I dunno, they're too prejudice. Does using the computer immediately mean that I'm wasting my time?

Oh, and she also "objected" against my idea for my English project (which is to make the cards look "old"). She said that it's messy, and she doesn't like how it looks since it would look dirty. She also said that I should just color it instead. No side "burns", no coffee-painting. =_=" She said I can continue with what I want, but judging by the way she said it, it's almost like she's indirectly saying "If you don't follow my advice, you'll be sorry". =_______="

You know, I feel like some sort of CHAINED puppet right now. I don't mind being marionetted by Dietrich but it's my parents who are marionetting me here dammit. I don't think I'd ever be given an opinion or something. I really want to let them know about how I feel, but all I get is nothing. I don't get any decent replies, all I get are prejudiced sermons. I just really don't know now, I don't know what to do with my wretched life...

So yeah, I'm currently watching that scene with Ion angsting over Radu betraying him and stuff (YES, I'M WATCHING IT OVER AND OVER, REWINDING IT OVER AND OVER), and I'm crying my heart out because:
1) I feel like crying my heart out.
2) I know how it feels to be betrayed, just like Ion there.

And I'm pretty sure that my eyes would be all weird later, and I'm sure that I'd be kinda sleepy during the missa (mass) later. Gawd, am I turning into some sort of demon or what?O_o

Ah what the heck. I'll still cry my heart out while I have the time... and the chance. And now is, most probably, the time to do so, before I turn completely insane...

1 broken chains [+] 5:54 PM  



Of annoying parents and unoriginal terrans.

[mood | crappy/annoyed]
[music | Gackt - Redemption]

It seems that my parents are getting more and more annoying these days. I dunno if it's just because of that 'time of the month', but they really tick me off.

I arrived home from school (and after dropping by at Starbucks in the nearby mall) and I immediately started on my project for English. And then my mom barged in, teary-eyed, because she was "touched" with the movie that she watched =_=" So anyway, she took some tissue from my dresser and then glanced at me.

Mom: ... And what are you doing? *raises eyebrow* Didn't I just tell you a few days ago that you need to STUDY?
Me: This is my project in English. Any problem, madame? *sarcastic*
[insert a brief moment of silence here]
Mom: You better not waste your time on that, you know.
Me: DIDN'T I JUST TELL YOU THAT IT'S MY PROJECT AND I AM NOT WASTING MY-- *cut off because her mom closed the door on her*

Ugh... so much for talking to mom, I'm talking to thin air. =_=" ah what the heck. *locks her room door so no more disturbances will ensue*

I told you they're really annoying me these days. . . and I tell you, I AM really entering the rebellion stage because of THEM. *points to parents* But yes~ I still love them. Somehow. No really. *snorts*

And on another note, terrans are really original. *sarcastic again* One of my classmates "copied" my style of presentation for the 250 words thingy. *TWITCH* Yesss~ talk about original. Meh. =_=" Now our professor will be seeing one set of "semi-gothic" cards, and another set of cards which are... well... "neon". Of course, mine's the semi-gothic one. Meh~~

So yeah, I brought my project in English yesterday, since we have a long break (around 2 hours) during Fridays (and Wednesdays). I thought I'd bring my project along so I can work on it during my free time, and considering that I have around 250 words to "draw", I thought I shouldn't waste my time... I know that I know how to draw, but I know I can't draw all 250 words in one night, so yeah. Duh. XD

Unfortunately, I was stupid enough not to realize that some other people would see my progress, and might copy my style of presentation...

And yes, one of them did. She brought her "cards" along awhile ago, and I was like "O_O OMC NUUUU!!!" when I saw them. =_=" At least, her border was different (it's not TB, duh) and the paper that she used are colorful. Mine's only plain white, but I'll be doing something to it when I finish drawing everything. XD So yeah, her "cards" are colorful but I dunno, the colors are too neon-ish. It kinda hurts my eyes. =_=

Ah what the heck. I swear I'll make my project pretty. BECAUSE I'M THE FIRST ONE TO THINK OF THE CARD THINGY AS THE PRESENTATION, NOT HER DAMMIT!!!!

Actually, I was just keeping my emotions inside awhile ago. XD I felt like strangling her awhile ago, really. Can't she just think of a MORE ORIGINAL presentation? Nagmumukhang ako tuloy ang nangopya ng style, ano ba yan.

Damn herrrr.

I know I don't have the right to tell her what to do, but heck, I feel plagiarized. It's just annoying, really.

Ah what the heck. I'll post more next time. *runs off to do more on her project*

0 broken chains [+] 12:26 PM  


Wednesday, July 12, 2006
Fading. . .?

[mood | contemplative]
[music | still that lame old movie that my dad is watching.]

I just noticed that I'm not that enthusiastic about my studies for the past few days. Really, it's obvious, I tend to procrastinate more, and I tend to be more lazy. Like now, as I type this entry...

I've been "saved" yesterday, there wasn't a recitation, and the assignments weren't checked. And since there was the suspension of classes today, there's no reason to me to go to school tomorrow without having read the assigned chapters and having finished my incomplete Accounting assignment.

I dunno...

I was just thinking about how my highschool and elementary life was. All I did was study and run after awards, as my parents tell me to.

And now, I just feel like everything's crumbling into pointlessness. I don't feel like running after awards anymore, I don't feel enthusiastic at all.

Does this mean that I'm getting tired of the studying-hard habit? Or it is just because I'm affected by the cloudy skies which induce me into contemplation?

I just hope it's just the cloudy skies...

My parents are always there to nag at me about studying, but I don't feel motivated at all. And I try to think of a goal, but I always seem it would be impossible.

I tend to think of suicide at times, just to end it all off. But I haven't been kicked out of the Accountancy program yet, so I guess all I can do now is to plan.

And I guess I'm starting it now. :3

Does anyone know where I can buy some poison? I mean the lethal one, obviously. I need to buy some by myself, duh. How can I buy poison if I'm with my parents? =_=

I'm insane, I tell you.

Oh well. Off to do homework~ *walks off*

0 broken chains [+] 7:08 PM  



Parents... =_=

[mood | angry but still keeping it inside...]
[music | that lame movie that my dad's watching.]

Okay, so much for a good day.

Classes were suspended, although the announcement was only made one hour before we got dismissed. o.O Oh well. The rain and the dark clouds made up for it, anyway.

So yeah, I was busy camwhoring as Isaak during the afternoon, and I ate a lot too. Everything was okay until my dad barged in the room.

I told you, my parents sometimes never cease to annoy me.

So yeah, it went like this.

Me: *typing*
Dad: *goes into the room*
Me: Papa, we'll be at the event by 8:30 am on July 30, okay? ^_^
Dad: *speaks as he looks at the DVD player* You're not studying again!
Me: ... *TWITCH*
Me, in my mind: IF YOU WANT ME TO STUDY THEN GET OUT OF MY ROOM DAMMIT!!! DON'T WATCH YOUR DARN VCD HERE, WATCH IT SOMEWHERE ELSE!
Dad: I wanna watch this. Play it.
Me: ... *puts the VCD into the player*

And so the annoyance went on and on~ but he's still dense. And annoying. =_=
Meh, nevermind... *walks off*

The problem is, even if I'm not doing anything related to studies, I just can't concentrate since my dad's here =_= Heck, I can't concentrate if someone else is here that excludes the ghosts and magicians and stuff, thank you. =_="

I hate my life.

0 broken chains [+] 6:43 PM  


Tuesday, July 11, 2006
Shhh, don't tell anyone I'm online. XD

[mood | annoyed]
[music | silence]

Sneaking in, despite the fact that my dad's currently in my room, watching some random old movie =_=' I'm currently annoyed since my dad keeps whining about the movie, and he keeps saying "Wait, I've already seen this movie!" or something like "The movie is too old." o____O Like hello, why did you buy the movie in the first place?

And the other thing that annoys me right now is that some terrans are just too unreliable. Like what I said in one of my previous entries, these terrans never reply to any of your messages, especially if the message contains something that says "I need your help", blahblahblah. It's so annoying. I'm really tempted not to reply to their text messages next time, just in order to give them a dose of their own medicine...

But then again, I guess I'm too kind. But my fuse is running short. XD

*ahem* Anyway.

I got a handful of "sermons" from my parents a few days ago. So I'm gonna stay "quiet" for a few days.. ~_~ Besides I'm kinda annoyed at them, they did nothing but nag at me about my studies.

Meh.. I know I'm not doing my best but.. *sighs*

Now I feel regretful for having studied too much during my highschool days. o.O I didn't even get to enjoy the somewhat "free" time I got there and all.. lol. It seems that my "flame of enthusiasm" is fading. Meh~~

Oh well. I guess my Isaak cosplay WILL be my first AND last cosplay =_=" Oh well. I need to save up. So I can shoulder the cosplay expenses on my own, perhaps? But then again, I'm still dependent on my parents o.O And I don't have a business of my own yet, so meh =_='

...

It rained awhile ago, lol. The winds were strong too... and because of it, me and my friend Mitchie arrived at the mall after a few hours o_O So yeah, we stayed at the mall for a while, ate at Starbucks and did our Finance homework... and yeah.

I had fun, obviously. My feet hurt though. XD

We also got to buy this notebook that has the design "Coffee Addict" on it. Mitchie and I bought one each. XD We're gonna use it as our notebook for our Law subject, squee. XD;;

Okay, my entry's getting long. o.O I should be off now. X3 Bye.

0 broken chains [+] 10:47 PM  


Sunday, July 09, 2006
*sings* In the cold breeze that I walk along...

[mood | full]
[music | Wolf's Rain - Stray]

...the memories of generations burn within me...

Meh.

I'm still not done with homework. XD
I still have around 3 things to do...

And we're going out later to hear mass.. and I'm sure I'll be spaced-out again. XD

Woot, I really have a bleak future... ~.~

0 broken chains [+] 6:56 PM  



Friends indeed, in time of need =_=

[mood | aggravated]
[music | Tsubasa Chronicle - Jasmin]

Don't you just hate it when a friend texts you only in times when she needs something? =_= And when you text her, or when you need her, she doesn't reply.

Pffft.

I'm giving her the "oh, I dunno" treatment now.

Why should I even bother? Every time I text/ask her about something, it's either she:
1) Doesn't reply
2) Say she doesn't know about it.

Feeeeeeeh. *stomps off*

0 broken chains [+] 11:44 AM  



Uhhh. Huh. >_>...

[mood | envious]
[music | Cowboy Bebop - Tank!]

I know. I'm envious. XD

But then again, I don't have much right to be envious because it's my doing after all......... XD I've been procrastinating too much.

I envy my classmate... XD She's already done with our Finance homework, and our Accounting homework.. and she's halfway done with our English project O.O Woot.

She really knows how to manage time. X3 *worships her*

I need to start working on my homework.... =___=

0 broken chains [+] 11:28 AM  


Thursday, July 06, 2006
...more rants on Financial Management? XD

[mood | DOOMED!!!!]
[music | Tsubasa Chronicle - Kaze no machi he]

FINANCIAL MANAGEMENT QUIZ TOMORROW.
AND I CAN'T REMEMBER/ABSORB ANY OF THE FORMULAS~~~

*runs around*

I'M DOOMED!!!!! X_X
I'm sooo going to have a clean paper *again* tomorrow. Damnit. XD

And it's kinda funny that THAT PROFESSOR keeps on telling/scaring us about the CPA board examination. =_=" Like, hello~ we're still in second year, so we can't tell if we are going to take that board examination or not O_o

Heck, I am even starting to DOUBT that I am going to make it! =__= Feeeh.
Don't tell me that I'll be booted out of the Accountancy program just because of Financial Management? WTF.

A total WTF, I tell you.

I wish there's another professor who teaches Financial Management... I'D BE OKAY WITH ANYONE, BUT NOT HIM!!! Puh-lease.

And because of this darn subject professor, I even got to "love" our major subject =_= Even if it's hard.

Gawd. I'd rather take up FinAco (Financial Accounting), because AT LEAST, our professor for this subject is GOOD/DECENT. Unlike .. graaah. *groans*

Okay, enough ranting. Time to gather up money to hire an assassin attempt to squeeze in more formulas into my brain..... *runs off*

0 broken chains [+] 9:38 PM  



Ahihi, napahiya eh noh.

[mood | guilty]
[music | the net shop's music o_O]

Updating from the internet shop now. o_o I WAS SAVED AGAIN O.O woot.
Our professor in Accounting's absent... so yeah, we're free 'till 10:30am.

Meh, checked the forums awhile ago and I noticed that I THINK I offended someone in the TB topic of the forum ~_~

I guess I'm too addicted now, and I'm becoming narrow-minded, lol. Wait, I AM already narrow-minded, haha.

Anyway, we were talking about TB and one member posted about Hellsing in the topic. And being the stupid being that I am, I told him that he's going off-topic.. ~.~
So he retorted back in return: "Not really, we are still in the domain of TB. is comparing your beloved Trinity Blood to a vampire anime classic already being off-topic?"

Amp, napahiya tlga ako dun. XD *hides* I tried apologizing though, but I dunno if he'll accept my apology ^^;; I think I'm already annoying him ever since that "issue" thingy in the loveteam forum. Haha.

Anyway~

My throat's still kinda weird. I think I'm going to have a cold =_=" Or maybe 'tis just some sort of punishment since I kinda went overboard with my words a few days ago (yes, it's about that professor of doom).

Kinda bored now ~_~ I wanna play RO but I don't have load. X3 Nostalgia~~
No one's online at YM too. So I'm really bored... and kinda bothered.

I'm so stupid =_='

0 broken chains [+] 8:11 AM  


Wednesday, July 05, 2006
Ah, the wonders of music... *semi-emo mode*

[mood | pensive]
[music | The Rasmus - Shot]


Shot
by The Rasmus

Tonight we escape
Just you and me
We'll find our peace
Somewhere across the seas

Enough of the fright
Enough of the fuss
I'll be awake if he finds us
Needless to say
I'll stand in your way
I will protect you
And I...

I'll take the shot for you
I'll be the shield for you
Needless to say
I'll stand in your way
I'll take the shot for you
I'll give my life for you
I'll make it stop
I'll take the shot
For you
For you

Tonight we'll be free
I'll find us a home
Tonight we will be
Finally on our own

Enough of the hell
Enough of the pain
I won't let him touch you
I love you
Needless to say
I'll stand in your way
I will defend you
And I...

I'll take the shot for you
I'll be the shield for you
Needless to say
I'll stand in your way
I'll take the shot for you
I'll give my life for you
I'll make it stop
I'll take the shot
For you
For you

Enough of the scars
Enough broken hearts
I will protect you
And I...

I'll take the shot for you
I'll be the shield for you
Needless to say
I'll stand in your way
I'll take the shot for you
I'll give my life for you
I'll make it stop
I'll take the shot
I'll take the shot

I'll make it stop

I'll make it stop
I'll take the shot

0 broken chains [+] 8:52 PM  



Blearggggh. I need motivation ;_;

[mood | mellow]
[music | Gundam Seed - Shoot]

I was saved once... and I was saved again. However, I have a strong feeling that I won't be saved this time.

I just can't believe I spent 8+ hours doing NOTHING. Okay, I was surfing the net and stuff; that's doing something but I still consider it as NOTHING since I'm supposed to study and... =_= Argh.

I seriously NEED motivation. I'm gonna get myself into DOOM.
Oh wait, I think I AM already doomed. =_='

Meh~ I think there's going to be another recitation for Accounting tomorrow.. =_= Gaaah~ I'm really doomed.

...And~ quiz on Friday, for Financial Management. NUUUUUUUUUUU~ *groans* I DON'T UNDERSTAND THE LESSON~ WAH~ I HATE THAT---- THAT PROF!!!!!!! ARGH!!

*coughs* Okay, enough ranting. ~_~" As if I can do anything about it anyway... meh.

My throat's kinda weird lately... o.o I dunno. I feel like I'm going to have a cold =.= Nuuuu.

I'm currently burning the TB pics that I have for my friends Jeni and Nicole (who are going to July 30 too, yay XD)... ahaha, they're going to have all 451 pics in my comp, lol. XD I hope they get to buy that ticket soon. ~_~"

Meh~ feeling really lazy now =___= gawd. That's all for now I guess.. ~_~" Bye~

0 broken chains [+] 8:24 PM  


Monday, July 03, 2006
The past returns to haunt us all... (random title again)

[mood | uncomfortable]
[music | the aircon. lol]

Okay, I can't absorb ANYTHING here, I can't put what I'm reading into mind.
Great, I'm doomed for the Accounting recitation tomorrow. =_="

And guess what, I watched Pokemon on TV a few hours ago, and yeah, nostalgia~~ XD *random*

I'm getting more random every time I feel all worried and giddy with all the cramming.

Squeee, my mom's gonna kill me.

I dunno if I should sleep now.. or should I continue reading my Accounting? o.O
*walks off*

0 broken chains [+] 10:08 PM  



I'm losing hope... because of myself.

[mood | nervous]
[music | xxxHOLiC - Ayakashi no Izanai]

Meh... cramming time again. School's crap, I tell you. ~_~
I'm currently working on my reflection thingy for Religion, nothing special about that... but anyway I'm gonna read more about Accounting later, because we will have a recitation tomorrow X_X

And I can't help but feel scared because some of my classmates (who were called) didn't get good grades... and yup, that included some of my classmates who were doing "good" in class too. *groans* Gawd, even my classmate Barbs got an 80, and knowing her, she's not content with that grade because she's doing her best to get academic awards or so.

It's not that I'm not after awards too, but I dunno =_= I'm losing hope, haha.

Gawd. I'm hopeless. ~_~

Anyway, I made a new layout (even at a time like this, lol). And I like it XD It's my favorite TB pic as of the moment X3 *stares*

Anyway, just a short update. 'Till next time~~

0 broken chains [+] 9:26 PM  


Sunday, July 02, 2006
The way of the fallen (random title, really.)

[mood | aggravated]
[music | Vandread OST - Vandread Meia]

Feeeh, long time no post.

Nothing much's been happening lately, school is crap as usual, and I'm still addicted to Trinity Blood. And now I got more pics, thanks to Ate Ori (oracle from Filcosplay) who gave me a great linkie. <3 Nyah.

So yeah =_=' I've been busy lately, although I still have the time to procrastinate sometimes...

=___= Well the reason that I'm annoyed tonight is that a certain someone texted me about this "homework" for P.E.... and being the dense person that I am, I asked her if there really was a homework (since I didn't hear anything about having to make homework, except for the practice for the dance part)... and all I got for an answer is a freaking "dunno."?!?! WTF

I therefore conclude that I won't reply to any messages sent by them UNLESS I feel like replying. =_= For Cain's sake, can't they reply more decently? Not in such a way that I feel like I'm getting a "careless" reply... *twitch*

Anyway, I don't feel like elaborating more on this matter =_= I still have the effing reaction paper to do for Entrepreneurship o_O And I wonder if I'd get to write anything about it because I'm not really listening during that time =_= Our professor for that subject makes me feel bored.

...I seriously need to have some motivation.

*turns to the pic of Cain in Krusnik form*

.. *prays*

OH CONTRA MUNDI~ HELP MEEEEEEEEEEH XD

*gets whacked, and then walks off*

0 broken chains [+] 8:03 PM